< Eyecatch >
< TS: Infirmary >
< ED >
Good morning.
It's Hasegawa-kun!
That was scary!
まだまだずっとぎゅっと はじけてる
madamada zutto gyutto hajiketeru
I’m still rolling around laughing on the floor
案外なんか はまってんじゃん
angai nanka hamatten jan
Weird, looks like you’re still going
人見知りしてる暇に
hitomishiri shiteru hima ni
While we’re still completely shy
は・じ・め・よ・う
ha ji me yo u
Let’s start!
友達作っちゃって 遊んじゃって いぇい！
tomodachi tsukucchatte asonjatte iei!
Make friends, and play, yay!
M A Z U I P R E S E N T S
普通に見えて 実は超さびしい
futsuu ni miete jitsu ha chou sabishii
I look like I’m normal, but I’m really feeling lonely
もーそーなら バイ バイ バイ
mo-so- nara bai bai bai
In my delusions it’s bye, bye, bye
親友なら いない いない ない ない
shinyuu nara inai inai nai nai
No good friends, sigh, sigh, sigh
何の不自由なく だけど足りない
nan no fujiyuu mo naku dakedo tarinai
I don’t have problems, but then I don’t have enough
リア充から 遠い 遠い 遠い
riajuu kara tooi tooi tooi
Popularity far away, way, way
親友なら いない いない ない ない
shinyuu nara inai inai nai nai
No good friends, sigh, sigh, sigh
残念どうしで 集まったら
zannen doushi de atsumattara
But when unfortunates come together
Ah! 予想ができない
Ah! souzou ga dekinai
Ah, stuff that you just can’t predict
展開を 地雷を踏んだ
tenkai wo jirai wo funda
Stepping on social landmines
そわそわ 絶対ずっと 覗きたい
sowasowa zettai zutto nozokitai
Man, man, I totally want to peek
後悔なんか したくないって
koukai nanka shitakunai tte
I’m telling you I don’t want to regret
つまんないプライドなんて
tsumannai puraido nante
Take your cheap pride and
捨て切っちゃって 振り切っちゃって
sutekicchatte furikicchatte
Cut it off, throw it away
残念から してみたら
zannen kara shitemitara
If you look at it from the unfortunate
案外なんだ はまってんじゃん
angai nanda hamatten jan
Weird, looks like you’re still going
ぶつかって ドギマギあって
butsukatte dogimagi atte
Fighting with each other, getting nervous with each other
み・つ・け・よ・う
mi tsu ke yo u
Let’s find it!
友達作っちゃって 遊んじゃって いぇい！
tomodachi tsukucchatte asonjatte iei!
Make friends, an play, yay!
絶対絶対 覗きたい
zettai zettai nozokitai
Man, man, I totally want to peek
You! 捨て切っちゃって 振り切っちゃって
You! sutekicchatte furi kicchatte
Cut it off, throw it away, yes!
Yes! どうだい どうだい そこんとこ！
Yes! doudai doudai sokontoko!
How’s that? How’s that? You get one word!
「Underclassmen Don't Know How to Hold Back Σ(゜口゜;」
Hey, anyone here—
That's a nun's uniform, isn't it?
Why's this kid wearing—
I caught the delinquent bullying a little girl as she sleeps on camera.
I didn't know you were a lolicon, Kodaka.
I'm not!!
That's for the people who see this picture to decide.
Maybe I should upload it to an imageboard somewhere?
Stop making the misunderstanding worse!
M-Mikazuki Yozora!!
It's been a while, Maria.
Welcome to my room.
What do you mean 'your room'?!
This was my naptime room and you tricked me out of it!
You know each other?
Didn't I tell you before?
Takayama Maria here is one of the school's resident sisters, and the moderator for the Neighbors Club.
Moderator??
This little kid?
Don't call me little!
I am officially a teacher here!
How old are you?
Ten!
You really are a kid...
And what did you mean by "tricking" you out of this room?
This woman came to my room all of a sudden, then slapped me on my right cheek!
And then she says,
The Lord said, 'If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.'
and then slaps me on the other cheek too!
It hurt!!
And then she says,
"The Lord also says that if someone strikes your right cheek, give them your room also."
"Oh, and also sign the paperwork to officiate their club."
"And make sure you stamp it too."
But when I looked it up after, I found out that's not written anywhere in the Bible!
Liar!
Thief!
Poop!
How did you let yourself fall for that?
I was scared!
I thought she'd hit me more if I refused!
Well, that sounds pretty rough...
By the way, who are you?
My name's Hasegawa Kodaka.
I'm a member of this club.
So you're Yozora's underlings?
How rude.
I'm not any underling of that thing.
Exactly.
That Meat there is an outsider with no relation to this club at all.
I'm a proper member!!
Be quiet!
This room is mine!
I won't be a moderator for some club I don't care about!
All of you, get out!
So the kid cracks under pressure in the end, huh?
What did you say?
I guess I was silly to expect a kid to be able to handle moderating a club.
How dumb of me.
A grown-up would never abandon a duty they committed to, after all.
I'm a perfectly mature adult!
It's okay, little girl.
It's too bad, I really thought that the genius sister Maria-sensei would be able to handle it.
I guess I overestimated her.
I'm an adult!!
Supervising a club is a walk in the park for me!
You shouldn't push yourself too hard, you know.
Th-This is nothing for me!
So you'll continue being our moderator?
Of course!
Then beg me to allow you to be our moderator.
I want to be your moderator! Please allow me to!
I'll be using this room freely, then.
Do you swear to God?
I swear!
So if you ever say you'll quit again, I'll strip you and post pictures of you naked on the net, agreed?
Fine!
Really?
Well then, let's give a round of applause for our moderator, Takayama Maria!
Come on, you too.
R-Right...
That's a bit embarrassing...
Well, just leave it to me, you trash!
You'll be cleaning the room every day.
And I'm thirsty. Get me some tea.
Alright!
There's nothing easier than fooling an idiot.
Someone's watching you?
Yeah...
I keep feeling this weird gaze on me...
Like... a stalker?
Are you serious, Kodaka?
You know, 90% of the time a stalker's motive is driven by love of some kind.
Maybe you've finally found your true love in this school!
Forget it!
I was an idiot to go to you guys for help in the first place!
Wait, Kodaka.
A club can't just leave one of its members in distress like that.
We'll help you catch this stalker.
I see what you mean by "weird gaze"...
Yeah, I guess it wasn't all in Kodaka's head after all...
This isn't what I was talking about...
Every single person we pass is staring at us!!
This isn't like some mystery person from the shadows!
Sena-sama, my heart is breaking!
Forcing two beauties to serve him...
Oh, I see what you mean.
No!! I'm—
So that was a real delinquent's "The hell you think you lookin' at, punk?!"
That's the first time I've seen it in real life.
They're the ones who wanted to come along, so why am I the bad guy?
So you're the culprit?
What's this?
So this is what they call "extortion"...
No!!
My name is Kusunoki Yukimura, year 1 class 1.
Your name sounds like a Sengoku period samurai's.
Indeed. My parents hoped I would be a Japanese man as great as Sanada Yukimura.
Japanese... man?
Yes. As you can tell, I am a man.
Actually, I'm not so sure...
So why were you following me around?
The truth is, I am being bullied.
Bullied?
So that happens at this school too?
There is no school without bullies.
Why does there always have to be bullies?
Probably because it's fun.
Fun?
Humans love hurting others when they can't be hurt themselves.
Like killing animals, or flaming people online.
And if the target makes a mistake, it fans the flames even more,
and the bully gets even more fun out of it.
I guess a real bully would know.
Don't lump me in with them!!
S-So why are you following Kodaka around?
Well, I decided to learn how to be a strong man like Kodaka-senpai.
What?
Like this good-for-nothing delinquent?
What?!
To live only by one's own will, unbound by law or reason.
To be both frank and open-hearted.
To take that of value as you may desire.
To destroy those who stand in one's way.
To have women as servants and feast in debauchery.
To stand in defiance of the gods without fear.
For all under Heaven and Earth to exist but for you!
What am I, Dong Zhuo?!
I follow the school rules!
I've never extorted anyone, or made women serve me!
And such humility.
I'm not being humble!
So you want to become a strong man who can't be bullied?
How are they bullying you?
The other boys in class are shunning me.
For example, when I begin changing for gym class, the boys around me run away.
And when we play dodgeball,
Wait...
I'm the only one they don't throw the ball at.
That doesn't really sound like—
How heartrending.
I can hardly hold back my tears.
I receive such treatment because I look feminine.
If I become more manly, this bullying will stop.
Kusunoki Yukimura?
I have only praise for your conviction to stand against such injustice.
You may learn the ways of men under Kodaka.
Thank you very much.
But...
Kodaka is quite busy with the Neighbors Club activities.
If you join as well, you may observe him close up.
Then I will join.
That's completely different from when I joined the club!
What do you think you're doing, Yozora?
What are you complaining about?
Just think of it as having an underling.
Now you're a full-fledged delinquent.
Who's "full-fledged"?!
An underling...
I am Kodaka-senpai's underling...
I am happy.
So then...
Can I call you Aniki?
Whatever you want...
I thought having a 10-year-old teacher as club moderator was weird enough,
but now a boy who from any angle you look must be a girl joined the club, too.
An-chan, you haven't talked about anything but club lately.
Huh? Did you say something?
I have said nothing of importance.
Did you think Reisis V. Felicity Sumeragi could lose composure?
Indeed, no.
Yeah, yeah. Don't be picky with your food.
What's this?
A meal.
Yozora told me that an underling must provide meals and gangster comics.
That woman and her dumb ideas again...
With that, please enjoy, Aniki.
Forcing him to buy his lunch?
Poor kid...
Hey! Wait!
Dammit, my reputation's been getting worse ever since I joined the Neighbors Club!
Science Room
Hey, are you okay?
This is actually pretty interesting.
I'd better pay Yukimura back for this.
Dark, dirty blond hair and angry-looking eyes.
A second year student with average height and build.
Did you carry Rika to the infirmary, Senpai?
Rika?
Shiguma Rika.
Written "intention" and "bear", as in the animal.
And "Rika" as in "scientific society".
I'm a first-year.
I see...
Yeah, I carried you to the infirmary.
Thank you very much for saving me.
No, don't mention it...
I can't let that go by.
You saved my life, Senpai.
I must give you something of equal value in exchange.
Your life?
Was that stuff in the beaker that dangerous?
No, not particularly.
It was a fast-acting sleeping gas, and actually quite safe.
Then I didn't save your life.
Indeed, my life was not in danger.
But if you hadn't carried me to the infirmary,
men reaching the point of desperation would have performed vile acts on my body!
Vile acts?
Rape.
Rape?!!
That's what always happens in the books I enjoy reading.
The men would act on their heart's desire and violently rip the clothes off my body as I slept,
and one after another they would plunge themselves into me—
plunge themselves into my delicate body—
Did she just say "rape"?
Did she get raped?
Stop! Come with me!
Wait!
Kodaka?!
Oh, sorry...
Wait, no—
What's this about rape?!
That isn't something to talk about in front of other people?
Anyway, you saved my virginity from being taken, so I have to pay you back somehow.
I don't need it.
It looks like you messed up while dyeing your hair. Should I fix it for you?
This is my natural hair.
Really.
My mom was from England. It's like a memento from her.
I don't want to do anything to it.
What are you doing?!
I have interest in your DNA.
What kind of interest is that?
I should go back to the science room now.
Science room?
Yes. My class is the science room.
I've never heard of that before...
It's like the science room version of class in the infirmary.
Wait, doesn't that mean...
I see.
You've got troubles of your own, too.
Please don't look at me so kindly.
It's embarrassing.
Oh, Senpai, I still haven't asked your name.
Oh, it's Hasegawa Kodaka.
Hasegawa Kodaka-senpai...
This is the first time I've ever been interested in a mammal!
I've made coffee, Aniki.
Though... why are you wearing a maid outfit, Yukimura?
Special training in order to become a real man.
What kind of special training is that??
Yozora told me,
"A real man emanates an aura of manliness that cannot be hidden, no matter what clothes he may wear."
What kind of messed up things are you teaching him this time?
And what about you?
I hear you raped an innocent junior.
I didn't do anything like that!
And that girl has trouble with people so she has class in the science room!
I wonder about that.
I remember now!
That girl you helped!
She's the genius inventor girl, Shiguma Rika.
They say that she's been building electronics, drugs, and software for the industry since elementary school.
And so Papa got her to enroll here, and allowed her to never attend classes.
She doesn't need to go to class??
Right. Her class is the science room.
The science room itself was constructed specifically for her.
So she gets extra special VIP treatment?
Is it really okay to treat a single student like that?
Isn't it common sense that superior humans are given preference over the filthy common masses?
I should totally have my own room built for me too.
Here you go.
Thanks!
I found you, Kodaka-senpai!
What's wrong?
I heard you're a member of this Neighbors Club,
so I figured I'd join too!
Join?!
I've brought the application form.
Shiguma Rika, are you aware that this club has the highest of goals in mind?
For that reason, there are conditions for joining us.
When you say goal, do you mean making friends?
How do you know that...
I figured, from the "recruiting friends" message hidden in your poster.
You actually figured that out from the poster?
So I guess I was right?
I'm confident in the fact that I have no friends.
It would seem you pass the qualifications for entry.
Starting today, you are a member of the Neighbors Club.
Now I can meet Kodaka-senpai every day after school!
I hope we can all get along!
Insofar as not getting between myself and Kodaka-senpai, that is!
You certainly don't seem unsociable...
Something in your pocket hit me...
Oh, sorry! I left a dirty magazine in there.
A dirty magazine?!
You walk around carrying that?!
Yes!
Would you like to see it?
And you show it to people?!
This gets me all excited and drives me crazy!
All I see are robots here...
What part of this is dirty?
Well, this here is Twin-Z x Unit 02...
"Hahaha! How did you like the taste of my Hi-Mega Bazooka, Unit 02?"
"Noo! It's so hard and thick, it's reaching all the way inside!"
"I-It's amazing!"
"How about that? You're weak right there, aren't you?"
"I'm going to pierce right through your DT-Field!"
"S-Stop! This is my first time, so be gentle!"
"I can't take such a huge double-barreled Megabeam Cannon!"
"I'm at my limit!"
"Energy at 170%, charge complete!"
"Here I come!"
"N-Nooooo!"
"I'm going to break!"
"Ah... Ahhh! Your force is filling my insides..."
"Universe!!!"
Uh...
It's brilliant no matter how many times I read it!
Especially Unit 02's face when they both reach the climax...
It's amazing, right?!
No one else can draw an expression quite like that!
You are broken.
I've always known that.
No one will ever understand me.
But I won't lose.
Senpai! How about trying out sexual intercourse with me?
Wha—
What kind of lewdness are you suddenly spouting?!
But Senpai, haven't you heard of the concept of a "sex friend" before?
No! Of course not!
You're surprisingly innocent, Senpai.
Regardless, that's not allowed!
Se—
I mean, I won't allow that kind of immoral friendship!
But you know, they say males and females can't form normal friendships.
That's not true!
What's wrong, Yozora?
Nothing. Never mind.
It would appear I've trodden on a land mine...
Either way, let's try out all sorts of things together, Kodaka-senpai!
I don't know why, but something's prickly in my heart...
How did that dumb poster lead to this?
What is with that girl?
Why's she so attached to Kodaka?
Did you say something?
No...
I didn't say anything!
あぁ昇んない想像理想の現実逃避
aa nobonnai souzou risou no genjitsu touhi
Ah, I’m in denial about how my ideals just don’t happen
今更どっちだっていいけど 友達作り
imasara docchi datte ii kedo tomodachidzukuri
I don’t really care about that, for now I’ll just make friends
一人寂しい奴だと蔑む 視線が気になるんだ
hitori sabishii yatsu da to sagesumu shisen ga ki ni narun da
I don’t like those looks of pity thinking I’m all lonely
上面だけ集まったら それでいいと思っているうちに
uwadzura dake atsumattara sore de ii to omotteiru uchi ni
But just when I thought having fake friends would be fine
あれよ あれよ 「どこ」は常ソロで
are yo are yo doko ha jou soro de
It happens, it happens, so that’s why I’m always alone
カーテンどんな奴らに
ka-ten donna yatsura ni
Those people on the other side
my best 乱されてゆく 頭くる曲に響く響く
my best midasareteyuku atama kuru kyoku ni hibiku hibiku
Keep screwing up my best, and it pounds inside my head
私の胸密かによせて 優柔不断意味で
watashi no mune hisoka ni yosete yuujuufudan imi de
You keep getting closer to me, but then you just can’t decide
my heart 伝えられない
my heart tsutaerarenai
I can’t tell you how I feel
残念なのは私なのか
zannen na no ha watashi na no ka
Am I really the unfortunate one here?
もやもやをかきわけずで
moya moya wo kakiwakezu de
These feelings just can’t push through
置き去りにされた 乙女心
okizari ni sareta otomegokoro
My pure heart left standing there
あの日からぼやっている
ano hi kara boyatteiru
It’s been fading in and out since that day
はやく見つけ出して迷子の心
hayaku mitsukedashite maigo no kokoro
Hurry and find it, my lost heart
Kodaka-senpai, give me your genes!
Inside me, please!
What are you—
Inside my test tube, please!
You already took some of my hair!
Oh, you said it was a memento from your mother?
Well, yeah. My mom was from England, but my dad is from Japan.
I always thought that halfs were all lookers.
Well, sorry!
Man, Kobato ended up so cute, but...
Kobato?
Next time: Now SAGA is Locked in Full-on Battle ヽ(｀д´ )ノ
Senpai, who is this Kobato?!